Living Outside the Box

There’s a popular song being played on the radio right now where the singer - a young woman - is bemoaning the fact that the object of her desire doesn’t notice her. She compares herself to the woman who does have his attention, noting “she wears short skirts, I wear sneakers,” and longingly wishes for him to see what’s right in front of his face.

As this song began to be played in frequent rotation, I found myself becoming annoyed with it. Not because the man can’t see the singer for who she is; that’s an issue for another day. No, I’m annoyed because the singer has so narrowly defined herself. Why does she have to be one or the other? Why can’t she be both the girl who wears sneakers and the one who wears high heels? Why can’t she be fully dimensional with many different sides?

This juxtaposition works as a metaphor in the song, but in real life we need to stop putting ourselves in boxes. This type of thinking limits us. We need to look at ourselves differently and recognize all the facets of our personalities. We need to explore who we are and experience whatever it is that intrigues us, no matter whether or not it is conventional to do so.

A few years back a group of us were trying to organize a horseback riding excursion. One friend stated, “black people don’t ride horses.” Why not? Who said? Show me where this rule is written down. Why do we put limits on ourselves and then become upset when others try to limit us? Those of us who went had a great time (well except for the one friend whose horse decided it was time to head for the barn, even though it wasn’t time to head for the barn).

Finding, and following, your passion

I went to see Julie and Julia today and I have the book on hold at the library. It was such a cute movie.

I really liked how the main character figured out a way to combine her passions for food and writing. She made it work and it worked out well for her.

That got me to thinking about how I could follow my passion. I love traveling and exploring new places, experiencing neighborhoods and restaurants serving local food. I love reading mysteries and the NFL. I am a contradiction.

So how do I combine these passions and take my life in a new direction? I'm not entirely sure, but I'm going to figure it out. Just like Julie and Julia did.

The Wonderful Word “No”

It’s one of the first words we learn. As toddlers, we utter it frequently and with strong emphasis. And yet, by the time we become adult women, we are afraid of it.

We shouldn’t be. Instead we should use it judiciously, to save our sanity, protect our health and maintain balance in our lives.

The word “no” is drummed out of us as little girls. Be nice. Be sweet. Don’t be mean. Don’t be selfish. Share.

All great concepts used to socialize us and make us fit to live in “polite society.” But little girls are molded to go the extra step and put others first.

By the time we’re adults, we don’t know how or we don’t feel comfortable taking care of ourselves. “No” is not a reglar part of our vocabulary. It needs to be.

We have to bring back the word “no.” When you’re overworked, stressed, worn out, taken advantage of or just flat being used, just say "NO."
No, I can’t head up that project. No, I can’t drive the carpool this week. No, I can’t carry your burden for you.

It feels selfish. But it's necessary.

Change - It's Good for You

We all know the old adage – if you do what you’ve always done, you‘ll get what you’ve always gotten. Have you ever thought about what that really means? It means you’ve got to change.
Change.
We resist it. We fight it. Often it is inconvenient. Sometimes it terrorizes us.
But out of change has come some of the world’s greatest innovations.
We can’t move forward in our lives without change. If we want to improve our health, we must make changes to our lifestyles. If we want to improve our positions in life, often we must seek out more education, get a degree, change jobs or strike out on our own.
Without change, America would not stretch “from sea to shining sea.” Yes, there were many negatives along the way, but this westward expansion created the country we live in and the opportunities we now experience.
We shouldn’t shun change, we should embrace it. Yes it can be painful, but it’s like eating your vegetables. It’s good for you. It causes you to grow. Even in the worst of circumstances, change can have a positive impact on your life. Especially when you can’t see the eventual outcome
So what change should you be embracing? What will make your life better? Figure it out and then make it happen. I found this unsourced quote on the Internet, but I’m making it my new motto “Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.”

Making a plan . . .

I am inspired by the many entrepreneurial women I've encountered and read about. And it has pushed me to try my own hand at starting a business. What do I want to do? I certainly won't be selling my knitted scarves. LOL

But what do I know? Writing, public relations, travel. So I am exploring branching out into those areas. It seems the direction to go. Much research to do; I have to come up with a business plan and then marketing and communications plans. A Web site is mandatory. I do have a somewhat catchy name (I'll unveil that later) but I need a logo. There's so much to do.

I'm gonna give it a go. Stay tuned. I'll keep you informed.

Relay for Life

Spent the evening at the Cole County (Jefferson City, Missouri) fairgrounds for the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life event. This is a truly worthwhile annual event that raises funds for cancer research.

The event is designed to mimic the cancer patient's journey through cancer. It begins early evening and continues overnight. The teams are asked to have at least one member walking all night to symbolize the fight against cancer through the darkest hours of the night until the sun comes up the next morning.

Each year since 2003, my sorority(Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc.) has fielded a team and participated. Now we're all a little too "prissy" to camp out (my definition of camping is a hotel)but we still want to take part in this important event. Who doesn't know someone who has been touched by cancer?

So each year we raise money, show up and participate in the event and leave about 10:30. We sleep in our own beds. LOL

No matter - if you have a chance to support an event such as this, please do. It's certainly worth it.

National Fist Bump Day

Just learned that there is a movement underfoot to make tomorrow National Fist Bump Day. It's to commemorate the fist bump between Barack and Michelle Obama one year ago.

So keep it in mind tomorrow if someone offers you their fist. LOL

http://www.nationalfistbumpday.com/